Movie Critics - The Panel: Johto Journeys
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Introduction
Welcome to the second installment of Movie Critics: The Panel! Today, our panel will discuss three movies: Pokémon 3: The Movie - Spell of the Unown, Pokémon 4Ever - Celebi: Voice of the Forest, and Pokémon - Heroes: Latios & Latias, thus finishing up the movies taking place in the first two regions.
Just like last issue's panel, Lady Salamence, jumpluff, Jellicent, and Layell all re-appear with their previous topics, represented by Salamence, Jumpluff, Jellicent and Sneasel, respectively. However, Kadew, another permanent member of the panel who was absent last issue, joins us, discussing the visuals of the movies, and is represented by Breloom. Also, Solace appears as a special guest this issue, to discuss the locations and areas in the movies, and is represented by a Masquerain. Just like last time, this article is chock-full of spoilers for the Pokémon movies I mentioned, so if you wish to watch those spoiler-free, do so before reading this article.
Pokémon 3: The Movie - Spell of the Unown
When I was a small child, I wished to be Molly Hale. The depths of her sadness did not strike me until years later, but when it did, I was a little surprised; the third film is quite moving, in its own way, and somewhat unique in some aspects among the Pokémon movie canon. Although this movie is still, well, a Pokémon movie, and Molly is actually kind of a brat sometimes upon rewatching, she is a highly sympathetic character (as is Ash, for once) and the story is highlighted with surprisingly touching, sweet moments between her and her loved ones... unfortunately underscored by that special brand of Pokémon creepiness, because you can't tell me Entei isn't kinda weird, if endearing himself (in his devotion and notable fluffiness, if not convention)... we'll just forget the Unown for now.
The whole setting being a result of the imagination of a tiny girl, the creators saw fit to include many adorable Pokémon, making the third movie the first of many absolutely full of cutemon fanservice. Flaaffy, Teddiursa, and Phanpy are all stellar examples of cutemons, and in this film they're extremely powerful too; I take it Entei Molly actually knows how to use an Action Replay EV train. Anyway, her battle against Brock is the highest concentration of successive cuteness seen so far in the series, full of cuddling, dancing, and heart-melting posing. I'm pretty sure Brock's Onix fainted simply from colliding with the force of Phanpy's sheer charm! Also, Ash's Cyndaquil, while not getting much screen time that doesn't involve fainting or blasting holes in things, also rates a mention. It just looks so happy and huggable; I bet cuddling it would really warm you up!
Ash doesn't really get to display his usual amount of idiocy in this film. That's not to say he's not an idiot, granted; he just doesn't get much screen time. Throughout the movie, he's incredibly reckless, though at least it's for a good cause (saving his mum). When the fake Entei steals his mother, he embarks on a quest into icy danger to save her, which is surprisingly valiant. Granted, when it's been explained to him that the Entei is a figment of Molly's desires, he still tries to rationalize with the fictitious beast instead of the small child. When things heat up against Entei, we see Pikachu swiftly dodging each of its attacks. That is, until Ash dives forward and grabs his friend, culminating in both of them being blown off of a gigantic ice castle in a powerful explosion. Thankfully, deus ex Charizard. Who knew it watched the 6 o'clock news?
While that would be idiocy enough for one brief movie, that's not where Ash's fatuity reaches its climax. Instead, let's turn our attention to the Pikachu short that starts this film off. In this short, Ash acknowledges that it's the anniversary of him meeting Pikachu. What he doesn't seem to realize is that he met Pikachu on his 10th birthday. That would make Ash 11 at this point, though years later, even in BW, we see him claiming to be 10. I theorize that he ceased celebrating his birthday in exchange for celebrating his anniversary with Pikachu. Has he aged? Certainly. Has he realized it? ...That's why Ash is an idiot...
What better way to begin discussing the big visuals and 3D effects of the Pokémon movies than one of the most visually stunning of them all? Here, we have a whimsical crystal kingdom birthed out of the mind of a five-year-old and a reality-distorting hivemind Pokémon. Beginning when Ash and co. crest the hill into Greenfield and witness the "bizarre crystal wasteland" as Jesse so well put it, we go through a visual journey, trudging through the cold and harsh yet beautiful crystal exterior that gives way to an inside where physics and reality are pushed aside for aesthetics. Flights of floating stairs in flowered fields that then fall underwater, all within a giant crystal artichoke palace. Magnificent.
And then the Unown went crazy and everything turned to spikes.
Which brings us to the other part of the visuals, the 3D effects. The Pokémon movies are rather known for the conspicuous 3D that stands out uncomfortably from the traditional animation, but this movie is just before the CGI got out of hand. The only real noticeable 3D animation is that of the Unown themselves, but here it is not quite so eye-burning as later, but is instead almost fitting, giving the Unown an otherworldly quality, as though they'd actually tumbled out of another "dimension."
So I'm here as a guest member to talk about the location of each of these movies. This movie, Spell of the Unown, takes place in Greenfield in the Johto region. However, the movie gets away with being diverse in its locations through the imagination of Molly, the lonely little girl who creates an alternate reality for most of the movie. This alternate reality allows the movie to create a bunch of different locations, like the giant crystal castle that becomes Molly's home. There are a few other nice places inside the castle, such as the beach where Molly and Misty battle, that create a nice set-up for the nature of the movie. However, the alternate reality also served as a crutch, and ended up making the movie a bit confusing as the location was as capricious as Molly's mind, which made it less enjoyable to watch in that sense. Overall, while the locations were pretty, they also aided in the disjointedness of the movie.
Such a great movie, but nothing for me to talk about! Technically, Molly and Entei could be pegged as the bad guys, but in all fairness, they weren't. Entei was created specifically to fulfill a five year old's wishes, and Molly is a mere five year old who obviously can't be to blame for what happened.
Then there are the usual suspects: Team Rocket and Brock. Team Rocket, as with a bunch of other movies, sadly changed to the good side, at least temporarily, which disqualifies them. Brock and his usual antics, 'Hi I'm Brock, and I want to be your girlfriend' and 'If everything is beautiful in Greenfield I cant wait to see the girls!' probably qualifies him as a bad guy, if not in the normal fashion. Also Meowth needs to stop breaking the fourth wall.
That leaves only Unnown as the bad guys, and considering we don't know anything about them from the movie, I don't want to peg them as bad or good. So I guess Brock is the bad guy. Have a nice day.
Once again I'm purposely fast-forwarding through any of this plot and feelings related drivel and diving into the pure unbridled horror of trained monsters going toe-to-toe against each other. The third film of the franchise really understands me because of what I call the "Charus Ex Zardina" where Ash's Charizard will randomly appear out of nowhere to burn everything. More on that later; the mandatory intro song battle can be surmised as following: Ash and Lisa trade single attacks against each other which always KOs the other's Pokémon. Totodile blows one burst of water after a little jig and Granbull is down. Chikorita in a rare display of competence manages to get in a Razor Leaf and a Vine Whip before being hit directly by a Psybeam and falling down the NEFARIOUS PLAYGROUND SLIDE! Curse you public amusement facilities, does your capacity for disasters know any bounds! Noctowl knows what is up and eats Lisa's partner Aipom for lunch, ripping its head off and using the dead monkey's tail to clean his beak (I'm watching the director's cut and this totally happens). Bulbasaur fights a Butterfree, the fight doesn't last long yet again as Butterfree blows him off. Cyndaquil roasts a Mankey which is now the second onscreen monkey-related feeding frenzy in the first battle! Finally, Ash learns that Quagsire doesn't have any horn for Pikachu to aim at, but luckily he knew the value of teaching Headbutt in GSC and won anyways.
The next major battle is Brock versus the now adult Molly. This battle is notable because Brock doesn't try to make his own moves on her, (Brock probably figured rule of law for little girls who are magically older is a bit vague). Zubat versus Flaaffy is basically proving that Brock is just stalling for time so Ash can get to the top of the tower. He picked no better mon than Zubat and goes straight for the Confuse Ray, just like in every cave you see them! One ThunderShock later and the little bat is gone, talk about a super effective curbstomp! When Vulpix takes the stage, Teddiursa pulls another no-contest. Brock confirms that Pokémon from the Dream World here are more powerful (tell that to my Truant Durant though). Finally, Phanpy proves Rollout is the most OP move of the second gen against Onix, which takes even less time than either of the other battles.
Molly versus Misty is essentially the same odds. Sorry for spoiling that, the fact that it's an underwater dreamland seems to be an excuse to just use moves nobody would use in reality. Rapid Spin and Whirlpool are now the harbingers of destruction that can sway the course of battle upon the carcasses of their enemies!
The last battle is the fateful Ash versus Entei, and while Ash alone is no match with his little mascotmons, when he is thrown out of the tower… to his death… he is saved.
IT'S THE CHARUS EX ZARDINA!
HE HAS RETURNED TO IMPROVE THE RATINGS!
THE MOVIE POSTER DID NOT LIE!!!
NOW FOR THE BATTLE WITH NO REGARD TO COMMON SENSE, TYPE ADVANTAGE OR TIER LISTS! STRAIGHT OUT OF THE RU LADDER OR THAT ONE TIME I SAW AN UBERS REPLAY WHERE TWO NEWBIES DID THIS MATCHUP UNIRONICALLY!
I MEAN CHARIZARD WILL DEFINITELY BE ABLE TO HANDLE MORE THAN ONE HIT UNLIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS MOVIE!
This battle delivers, cheap dodges, and bouts of fire versus purple fire (so we can all tell who is the bad guy here). Crystals pop out of nowhere so Entei can run around as he pleases. Too bad this battle ends as Ash tries to talk reason to the creation made by Alphabet Soup that can only learn one attack. Also a little girl gets in the way. I stand by this fight scene as amazing, it was fun when I was in elementary school and it still holds up!
Pokémon 4Ever - Celebi: Voice of the Forest
It seems fairly obvious that the Pokémon movie featuring the guardian of the forest would take place in a forest, but the location really fell flat. With Misty tripping on a branch near the beginning of the movie, we're stuck with a dead weight character (which is such a shame since Misty is amazing!) The forest itself narrows the movie, with the main conflict forced into being a lack-luster PSA about conservation and hunting. However, the lake at the forest and all the stuff that goes on there is one of my favorite scenes in all the Pokémon movies, so that gives the location a bunch of bonus points. Overall, the forest creates a mix of both the good and the bad to create a location that reflects what it was going for but doesn't do anything else particularly extraordinary.
The premise of all the fights in this film is that Dark Balls make Pokémon evil. I originally thought Dark Balls were a side effect of puberty but that works too. They are used by Dan Green in a black jumpsuit, red vest, and gold mask. Dan Green swipes a meek looking Tyranitar off an old hunter with his Dark Ball and begins tearing up the joint. This scene is completely unrealistic; it's patently insane. A Tyranitar that was not tearing up the joint on its own? Complete madness I say!
Ash's requisite theme song battle begins with a Trainer named Dundee with a Croconaw and has an awful Australian accent. What a walking stereotype might has well have given him a Kangaskhan and invent a shrimp Pokémon he could roast on the barbie while they were at it. Ash says he's never fought a Croconaw before and thus has never seen one either. Maybe if he'd leveled his own Totodile past level 18 this wouldn't have been such a ground-breaking fight for Ash. Before the Aussie can say another word the theme song jumps in and we don't have to hear Mr. Down-Under for the rest of the battle. Ash sends in Pikachu because fairness is not a concept our hero is used to. A bit of hemming and hawing via scratches and Ash gets enough sense to just ThunderShock the croc and the stereotype. Now, before Ash can go to round two of this fight and/or call for medical attention the plot boat whistles and our valiant hero leaves this fight with just enough time for the second verse to play.
The first battle has Ash and Sammy fighting against the evil Sneasel and Scizor. Sammy knows how to end battles quickly and pulls out his time capsule Poké Ball with Charmeleon. Ash misinterprets this as an opportunity to show off his Johto starter and sends out Bayleef. If this battle went as it should Bayleef would have broken like a twig while Charmeleon would just burn both of them to the ground. But no, Scizor gets taken out with Razor Leaf and Sneasel with a Headbutt. Then the two Pokémon that have massive blades on both their arms are tied by ropes onto nearby rocks. No wonder Pokémon are so useless without their Trainers when something as incredibly dumb as this happens. There is a reason there aren't any 'Pokémon Farm'-based uprisings occurring here.
After all the cuteness and friendship, we get what we've been worried about when the body that houses Dan Green's voice captures Celebi with his Dark Balls. This creature might be a formidable foe if it didn't look so ridiculous. The CGI is incredibly dated and what is supposed to be some tree monster looks like fur. It's supposed to look like a demonic Celebi and that makes it all the worse. It just floats around and pulls hyper beams. One aims straight for Ash and we all hope it hits but nope Suicune arrives so all the kids can remember to buy Pokémon Crystal. Even against a Grass-type like this monster Celebi it doesn't matter, CMCune has no weak! Bubbles are a weakness apparently! So Suicune gets hit and Ash and Sammy save the onion through the power of friendship!!!
Why couldn't it have just been more violence? That tends to help Ash most of the time darn it!
Ah, Celebi. There were some good visuals in this film, yes. Most all of the painted forest backgrounds expressed the lush and vibrant growth admirably, and certain scenes, such as breaking through the uncertain mist to the first view of the lake of life and the flight of the Butterfree in the start of dawn, had a great atmosphere. What I really want to talk about here, though, are the 3D effects: this is the movie where they began getting out of control.
Three-dimensional modeling isn't inherently bad, but when it stands out too much, is a bit too smooth and too uniform and too dimensional, it pulls the viewer out from being immersed in the story to acknowledge the out-of-place aesthetic. There are a number of shots and transitions where CGI is implemented in this movie to cut a corner, but the most inexcusable tragedies of form here come from Suicune's intro and Celebi's strange twig monster.
Suicune is an awesome Pokémon, and few will deny it, but its entry just doesn't do it justice. This awe-inspiring icon of the north wind, great and terrible, enters into the fray just in time to save the day with… a full 3D sequence that has an entirely different texture to the rest of the movie. Really?
And then that twig monster. That is just inexcusable. Celebi turning evil had so much potential, some giant tree monster that would tear the forest to a wasteland and would cause all to tremble and despair, and what do we have instead but some kind of bastard child of a bird's nest and a medieval flail ball, sliding across the ground while it looks like it just tumbled out of an N64. And then it morphs into some kind of floating winged deviltwigbeast and I don't even understand what they were going for. It is a poor design worsened by overuse of the then-very-limited technology, and it just doesn't look good.
At least we got to end with a Celebi time angel chorus.
There are simply no words. A mad genius who hacks their Pokémon to max level while simultaneously making them evil just by using a Poké Ball on them deserves mad props. Sadly, he obviously had no backup plan, and he associated himself with Team Rocket, which earn him negative points, but generally, on the list of bad guys, he scores very high. Too bad Ash is overpowered. Nerf him please, Nintendo.
Sadly there isn't much to discuss about 'The Iron Masked Marauder', so I will just discuss the young child known as Sammy. For anyone who watched the near end of the movie, a M. Night Shalamalama twist happens, and our young friend turns out to be the lovable Professor Oak. While a lot of small things pointed to the possibility, it certainly isn't something to expect.
As the movie begins, Ash's friends are leaving for a ferry that he's completely forgotten about. Instead, he's battling another Trainer and, against every basic rule of Pokémon battling that's ever been heard of, has Pikachu electrocute the poor lad. When Brock's Crobat reminds him of the ferry, Ash ditches his near-death foe to race to the boat. Although it's already set sail, Ash runs off the dock and dives towards the ferry, only barely making it aboard by the help of a fast-reacting passenger. Ladies and gentlemen, this is our hero.
When Ash meets the lost-in-time Sammy, they have a heart-to-heart chat. "I guess you know a lot about the future, huh, Ash? At least, more than I do," Sammy claims. Ash quickly responds, "Yeah, I guess so. But, I'm sure glad I'm not suck in it like you are!" What a way with words... It's not until the end of the film that Ash's idiocy reaches a downright depressing level, however. He attempts to force-feed a dead Celebi a berry, which is all parts depressing, misguided, and wrong. It fails. So what does he do? Continue to sullenly attempt to shove berries into this dead animal's mouth. C'mon Ash, we already learned tears are the secret to life!
You know what? I can't fault the movie on cute moments; that's all it's got going for it. Despite Celebi being the inferior grass pixie, any scene with Celebi in it is bound to be adorable (despite it somehow spending half of the plot whimpering and clinging to people's chests, and the other half of it blowing things up and electrocuting them alternately). And there's just so much gratuitous fanservice. The (admittedly sweet) scene at the Lake of Life was basically a typical ending in length and content, but jammed in the middle of the movie. The enthusiastic Furret who showed up twice (at the start of the film and in the middle to lead them to the lake, its only purpose to be utterly adorable) was the cutest thing in the series so far. There's even a Jumpluff in this film (glimpsed right at the end)! Despite efforts to temper it with bristling manly aggression, 'evil' Celebi's giant Katamari of violence and deforestation, and the usual badasses (Scizor, Tyranitar, Houndoom), the very nature of this film ultimately triumphed.
Unfortunately, the writers evidently attempted—and failed—to replicate the impact of the most moving moments from the first and third movies; this film was about as emotionally resonant as a hastily-prepared corporate apology. This film is cuteness junk food: good for a quick hit of sugar, but it won't fill you up, it won't satisfy you within, and if you don't leave room for dinner, you'll be sorry later.
By the way, this movie really demonstrates why they stopped releasing them theatrically abroad. Keep in mind its English title is Pokémon 4Ever; I do want to say that's something of an embarrassment, but it's 2013 and the only thing that's changed is albums have hashtags in the titles now.
Pokémon - Heroes: Latios & Latias
This is probably one of my least favorite movies. The plotline was subpar, the cries of the Lati twins made me deaf, and the bad guys... The bad guys were horrible. While I suppose Nintendo and Game Freak deserve a 'Get out of Jail Free' card since this is the first time they did this, it still doesn't excuse, what in my mind is, a horrible antagonist. Anney and Oakley are generic baddies, their whole existence can be summed up into one sentence: 'Try to take over the world, get really close, and fail.' They are unsubstantial characters, completely boring. Not the best bad guys to have.
For those of you who have never attended an Orange Islands movie night, you may not know that Pokémon Heroes is my favorite Pokémon movie. The location is no exception to this. Based off real-life Venice, Italy, the canal city Alto Mare gives the town a lot of character and makes it an intriguing location. The opening features a water race through the town, giving the viewer a look at the scenery all around. Additionally, all the side streets in the city make perfect sense for hiding spaces for the Lati twins throughout the movie. Alto Mare's canals also serve as one of the major problems when trouble brews in the city. This location created the perfect place for recreation, the romance of Ash and Bianca (or Ash and Latias, depending on who you ask), and danger, creating a movie with a ton of character and a great deal of fun.
Pokémon Heroes: Latios and Latias is pretty weird, even for a Pokémon movie. I'll say straight up that there's not so much raw cuteness, but if you can look past the unnervingness of quite a lot of the story, there's something greatly endearing about the stereotypically protective big brother Latios and the naïve and playful Latias (even in her human form, and I don't know what they were thinking with that). The scene in the hidden garden (which is kind of reminiscent of the last movie) is pretty much all you're going to get, though, and I strongly recommend placing it on mute if you don't want to be deafened by their shrill cries. Criticism aside, it is a highly cute scene: Latias is an extremely intelligent and kind-hearted Pokémon, and her efforts to befriend and understand Ash are touching. I mean, who else would worry about Ash if they pushed him off a swing? They're also cute Pokémon physically, especially Latias with her huge eyes and apparently downy, softly-angled features. It's a pity about the whole 'agitated seagull' thing they have going on whenever they see fit to make a noise.
Other than that, there's a scene at the start with Ash's Totodile, who is pretty much a troll and all the more adorable for his mischief. But he has an excuse this time! They cuddle and make up, and it's pretty sweet. Oh, and Annie owns a sleek, elegant Espeon; long-time readers may remember Espeon topped a trivia poll we ran years ago to determine readers' preferred cute Pokémon.
I always rewatch these films despite seeing them a few times before but it's bad when I struggle to remember any fights for this one. The fault of this lies in the complete lack of evil legendaries to hype up any fighting at all. I wasn't even sure if Anney and Oakley fought Ash. There isn't even a theme song fight, it's a race this time. Ash loses it because of forces beyond his control. There is also a 'chase' scene which involves a lot of architecture and scenery, and Pikachu does shock the rogues' Ariados and Espeon about three times. Riveting fights I assure you. I can't even call the Lati twin struggle against the rogues a fight because they both get the net treatment in one hit. Apparently String Shot and Psychic cause incredible amount of physical trauma. The combat is so dead in this film they had to revive fossils to get more fighting going on. Even against the Aerodactyl and Kabutops it's more of a race and chase on the exact same boat race device as before. That's about it for all the fights in this film, will we get a fight scene with more than three turns of battle? Find out next time!
Have you ever wanted to watch Ash Ketchum run directionlessly throughout a confusing, Venetian-inspired labyrinth of a city, constantly getting lost for about half an hour? Have I got a film for you! In the last issue, I mocked Ash for being the kind of guy to run into mysterious, force-field cages first, have his Pokémon attack them second. This time around, our hero does the opposite, and it might be more degrading to be honest. Pokémon attacks just get reflected against this mysterious power? Better throw my body against it repeatedly to see if that will work!
On the bright side, this is the film where Ash finally finds true love. Sorry all of you Ash x Misty, Ash x May, Ash x Dawn, Ash x Brock, Ash x whatever shippers. Watch this movie, and you know Ash has finally found his soul mate. It's a Pokémon, by the way. I'm just gonna chalk this one up to idiocy. I'd hate to know what the actual meanings behind such a relationship would imply...
The fifth movie I have a somewhat fondness for, as it was the only Pokémon movie I ever saw in theaters, back as a child merely having Pokémon in the name meant I would love it, but this won't excuse it from its not-so-few flaws. The movie of the Lati twins unfortunately has all the conspicuous CGI overdose of the previous movie without the pretty environments with nice atmosphere that the forest provided.
We start off in Alto Mare, some kind of Pokémon Venice, and the background paintings are pretty nice. Bright cheery colorful buildings, a Pokémon race, strange special effects silhouettes of the Latis, and a man named Lorenzo whose character design really irks me but I won't dwell on that too much because there are other much bigger problems to come. Like the chase scenes. Twice in the chases we have a claustrophobic first person view of winding between the alleys, none of the characters drawn in, just in-your-ears labored breathing and CGI buildings rolling past. It was all badly reminiscent of that old windows 3D maze screensaver, and they could have been cut out entirely and no one would have missed them, except perhaps for nostalgia of playing that old brick maze.
And then that machine. They really had no shame in making an elaborate construct for that, textures and reflections and all embracing the fact that it didn't fit in with the surroundings at all, just lost in machinery and iron ball of megalomania, summoning more dimensiony fences and water vortexes. At least it wasn't so bad, since the entire nighttime half of the movie was so washed with blue that it couldn't stand out overmuch. Dark blue: the movie right here.
And then everyone floated off to heaven in a Latios dew bubble soul and I don't even know anymore.
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