The Cryonicles might be the worst franchise in the history of SPL. The team has rarely experienced any form of success, having only made the playoffs twice in 10 editions of the tournament prior to SPL XI. Their last appearance came 6 years ago, when yondie crafted one of the best on-paper rosters I can remember, only to be toppled in the finals by the GOAT franchise. Since then, the Cryonicles have let down their fans year after year. Not even one of Smogon's best drafters, reyscarface, or Smogon's infamous economist, Valentine, could not save the franchise from its destiny. Eventually, Valentine handed off his position to his assistant manager, teal6. teal is many things, but he certainly isn't a competent drafter. His drafts always left much to be desired, as he was blinded by friendship on more than one occasion, leading to ridiculous selections like 10.5k obii. The franchise was an absolute disgrace, as they failed to break into the top 6 on even one occasion under teal's leadership. After coming to terms with his ineptitude and realizing that he would be much better off simply farming clowns as a player instead, teal6 finally decided to relinquish his managing position. The team was then taken over by two veterans: PDC and Triangles. Most people didn't have much hope for this managing core heading into the auction due to their lack of drafting experience and occasionally questionable opinions on the playerbase. They would be starting off with a bit of disadvantage compared to other teams as well, as they would start the tour with no retains to speak of. Could these two really bring the Cryonicles back to the playoffs for the first time since SPL V?
The team started off the auction by picking up resident tryhard Finchinator for 20k. Finch is a solid player, and he was arguably the 3rd best BWer in the pool behind SoulWind and dice. On the surface, 20k is clearly an overpay for Finch; as a player, I would value him at around 15k. That being said, the inexperience of PDC and Triangles makes this pick a bit more justifiable for me. Finch's passion for Smogon is unmatched, and no one besides BKC is probably as invested in SPL as Finchinator is. His tryharding antics are well documented, and he almost certainly assisted PDC and Triangles with the rest of the draft. Finch's "Big Board" has become sort of a meme after its reveal a few years ago; nonetheless, his myriad of opinions on the playerbase almost certainly had a positive impact on the squad. So, overall, this pick was probably fine.
The squad then picked up Eo for 17.5k. Many people including myself were very high on Eo, and the rather defensive nature of SS OU felt like a boon for him as well. This was a pretty good pick to me. The team then selected Tman for 11.5k; based on the official Power Rankings, this was an overpay. Tman was tied with MajorBowman as the highest-paid Doubles player in the tournament, but he was only ranked 5th in the Power Rankings. The general consensus seemed, even among non-Doubles mainers, seemed to be that SMB was the best player in the pool, and he was only 10.5k; this makes the Tman pick look even more questionable. After this, the team picked obii for 5.5k. This felt like a very early point in the draft to be taking substitutes, so I didn't really understand this pick at the time. obii did apparently assist a great deal in the rest of the draft, though, so perhaps this selection was justifiable.
The Cryonicles then decided to make the unwise decision of nominating z0mOG despite wanting no part of him on their roster; they were under the belief that he would almost assuredly be upbid. However, this was not the case, as z0m's personality in tandem with his decision to only sign up for ADV meant that no other team was willing to take a chance on him. Despite the fact that this purchase was accidental, I felt that it was a great pick-up nonetheless. z0m is easily worth over 3k, and with Triangles' ADV support, I figured that z0m could easily notch 4 or 5 wins against a sub-par playerpool. This was one of the first clear steals of the draft to me, and I thought it could help recuperate most of the value the team had lost with their earlier selections. The team's next selection was Sacri', whom they acquired for 20.5k. This felt like a fair price considering how hyped he was as a player; I thought this was a fine selection as well. They then acquired Updated Kanto for 13.5k, who had rebounded after a few mediocre tours with a solid performance in Snake III. I've been a big Kanto fan since he impressed me in his breakout tour in SPL IX, and after his solid Snake showing, I figured that he had the potential to smash the terrible ORAS player pool. This was another very sold pick up for the squad.
The team then managed to acquire the #1 player in the LC Power Rankings, Pablo, for only 6.5k. This was easily one of the steals of the draft; LC prices were rather strange, and it's unclear how such a hyped player was so cheap. Despite his hiatus from the game, he did have some solid results in the tier in the past, and the rather mediocre state of the playerbase made him a safe pick to perform admirably. The Cryos were humming along nicely, getting some solid value picks in z0m and Pablo and amassing a nice core of players. But, of course, every manager in this tour has to have an aneurysm at some point in the draft, I suppose. The Cryonicles, for SOME REASON, decided that it would be wise to draft Leftiez for 16.5k. Leftiez was a notable player in the past, but we all know that the clutches of the crust rule are hard to escape from. Not to mention, Leftiez was never a sheet warrior; he was negative on the sheet heading into this SPL, in fact. Nevertheless, I thought he had a solid shot of putting together a reasonably good season; he was simply about 9k? too expensive. If that pick wasn't bad enough, the team then squandered some more value by drafting Mr.E for 10.5k. I've been telling people to draft MrE for eons; he's a decent GSC player that will most likely grab 4-ish wins. That being said 10.5k was a bit too much for my liking; I value him at around 6-7k. The GSC playerpool was pretty bad, though, so this pick was fine in a vacuum since it wasn't too crazy of an overpay.
The team's next selection was some random named HML am for 4.5k for RBY. I had absolutely no idea who this was, but I liked the move since the team was clearly trying to spend as little as possible in the variance meme tier. The Cryonicles then rounded out their draft by taking Garay Oak and Jirachee for 3k each. There was really no evidence that Garay could succeed on the big stage in non-lower tiers, so this pick felt like sort of a desperation move for me. Jirachee, on the other hand, is a pretty known quantity. He is infamously terrible on the sheet, despite his rather lofty price tags in several SPLs. That being said, he does have a solid foundation in DPP, so buying him for 3k in the thinking gen felt fine to me. The Cryonicles also had DPP enthusiast Osgoode as a helper; I figured that his builds could definitely enhance Jirachee's performance. They also picked up another random named shawyu for 3k, who would prove to be an important part of the team later on.
The masses did not seem to be aboard the Cryonicles bandwagon, as they landed below the consensus "big 3" of the Tyrants / Wolfpack / Sharks. I, on the other hand, was pretty enamored with this team from the beginning. I thought they could easily get a playoff spot and put them 2nd in my rankings. I liked the majority of their draft, and especially liked the fact that they wisely decided to only spend 7.5k on the two variance tiers. Despite some pretty strange moves such as their decision to spend 16.5k on a crust player, the managers somehow managed to navigate the draft successfully and create what appeared to be a solid team on-paper, at least to me.
Things did not start out too well for the Cryonicles, however. They lost Week 1 to the Classiest, which revealed some cracks in their icy shell. Leftiez lost his first game to blargh, which would be a harbinger of things to come. It's never a good sign when your expensive crust player drops his first game; the wheels were already starting to come off for Leftiez. In addition, MrE decided to randomly slap a Smeargle onto a standard team and got absolutely demolished by anti, a good player with little GSC experience on the big stage. These two losses, as well as the overall week loss, were concerning, but I felt that the talent on the roster could overcome an 0-1 start. From here, the Cryos would start rolling. They won their next 2 match-ups, taking down the BIGs and one of the pre-season favorites in the Tyrants. However, despite this victories, the team still had some issues. Jirachee had seemingly vanished out of thin air some time during Week 2, so the team was forced to turn to their rookie, shawyu. Luckily for them, the thinking gen is one of the best tiers for unproven rookies to get slotted in to. With Osgoode's support, shawyu managed to start the season 3-0. Leftiez, on the other hand, would not be so fortunate. The crust rule once again proved that it should not be taken lightly, as Leftiez got smashed 3 games in a row. The team even tried to flex him to SS OU, but to no avail, as he was unable to take down Christo. Buying Leftiez for 16.5k was clearly one of the worst decisions of the entire draft, and the move continued to look worse and worse as the weeks progressed.
Due to Leftiez' inability to win, the Cryonicles were forced to search for other alternatives. They decided that it was in their best interest to ship him off to the BIGs for...soulgazer? This move seemed pretty weird to me, since SG was completely unproven in OU tiers going into this season, and was only worth 3.5k in the original auction. To make this trade even stranger, the team came up with a stipulation that, if Leftiez miraculously took down bro fist in Week 4, the BIGs would have to add Descending to the trade. This convoluted trade proposal seemingly defied all logic, at least to me. If Leftiez was good enough to somehow beat arguably the best player on the site, why on earth would you ever trade him for sg and a filler character in the first place? It just defied logic. And, to absolutely everyone's surprise, Leftiez actually DID manage to defeat John. SG and Descending now found themselves on the Cryos, as the team decided to trade away 16.5k for 6.5k worth of assets. This trade looked a lot better BEFORE Leftiez had beaten bro fist; if he could take down bro fist of all people, surely he can take down some lesser names in the coming weeks. It's not like SG is some OU world-beater or something. It should be noted that Leftiez was apparently rather inactive, while SG is generally pretty active in team tours, so that was a big factor in the trade as well. In addition, SG is a known lower tier sheet warrior, though, so perhaps he could transfer some of that prowess to SS OU and give the team the wins they so desperately wanted from that slot.
The team managed to take down the Sharks after Leftiez astounding victory over John, putting the team at a solid 3-1 record. The team slipped a little bit the following week, tying the Raiders after Eo got upset by a random named Vulpix03. Regardless, the team was still in a very strong position, and I ranked them 1st overall in my mid-season Power Rankings. The Cryonicles absolutely obliterated the 1st-place Ruiners 10-2 in Week 6; after tying the moribund Scooters in Week 7 and losing to the upstart Wolfpack in Week 8, however, the team found itself needing to get 1 point, most likely, to clinch a playoff spot in Week 9. Luckily for them, their final opponent was the worst team in SPL: the Tigers. The Tigers were an absolute abomination, and had just come off an absolutely disastrous performance against the Raiders in Week 8. The Cryonicles weren't too comfortable, though, as the ghosts of Finchinator's past tormented the team and made many of them stand on pins and needles for the entire week. To absolutely no one's surprise, though, the Cryonicles absolutely washed the Tigers, setting up a date with the Classiest in the first round of the playoffs.
The team's main carry was Pablo, who managed to exceed the expectations of even his biggest supporter's and wash all his opponents to claim an undefeated 9-0 record heading into the playoffs. z0mog also managed to put forth a crazy 7-2 performance, albeit with the assistance of a crazy amount of good fortunate. Finch and Sacri' were also doing well, while Eo and Kanto were slightly underperforming. The rest of the team was all doing pretty decent / average as well, with the exception of MrE, who was sitting at a lowly 3-6 record. All in all, though, the Cryonicles looked to be in prime position to continue their solid season and reach the finals.
However, we must not forget that the Cryonicles are, in fact, the worst franchise in SPL. It seems that they had only avoided their date with destiny for a brief 9-week period, as their semifinals series with the Classiest would be one of the most one-sided affairs in recent memory. It all started with Raiza getting some good fortune to secure a win against Finchinator; after this, Eo fell to Relous. Raiza and Relous entered the playoffs with a combined 2-14 record, so losing to both of these players was a severe blow to the Cryonicles' championship hopes. However, the gods did not want the Cryos to be out just yet, as they blessed MrE with scores of luck and put him in prime position to upset Anti and bring the series to 1-2. Unfortunately, MrE refused to accept this generous donation, as he threw away his Zapdos and SOMEHOW managed to get swept by Skarmory. To top it all off, MrE somehow had the gall to blame his demise on hax:
[21:10:20] +Mr.E: wish his lax rolled rest ever tbh
This log is still mind-boggling, even one day later; it seems inconceivable that he could possibly think he got haxed in that game. His teammates seemed to agree with me too, as their harsh comments eventually caused MrE to leave the team Discord in a fit of anger. He apparently said that he would rejoin should the team reach the finals, but the Cryonicles were currently staring at an 0-3 hole with Tamahome still to play for the Classiest, so the odds that they would reach the finals felt slim at best. Sacri' kept the team afloat for a little while longer, though, taking down a red-hot suapah and bringing the series to 3-1. The next Cryonicles' player, HML am, would not be so lucky, though. The gods were out for blood after MrE had spited them a day earlier, and they laid waste to HML am's RBY squad by blessing TIN's Tauros with copious amounts of good fortune that would make even Fear jealous. The team now had to put their faith in...obii? LOL Yes, it's true. The season almost certainly came down to a 3-14 Jerk player the Cryonicles randomly decided to start in the semifinals for reasons that still remain unclear to me. Could he channel some of ABR's magic and bring the team the win it so desperately needed to stay alive in the playoffs? Well, obii put forth a good effort, but he was unable to overcome a disadvantageous matchup. Garay was next to fall, using a rather questionable ORAS team and losing to Persephone.
The team now sat in a 6-1 whole, and now needed SG to bail them out of it in the thinking gen. The gods tried to sabotage him on multiple occasions throughout the game, but SG persevered, and managed to bring home the win in one of the closest games in recent memory. At 2-6, the team was still alive, but things still appeared to be looking very grim. The Classiest decided to stop toying with their food, and sent out their executioner: Tamahome. Did z0mOG have enough magic left in him to take down one of the Classiest's top 2 players and give his team a shot to take the series to a tiebreak? Well, no LOL Tama ended the Cryonicles season in disappointing fashion, as the team could do nothing but watch as their season went up in smoke before SPL Sunday even arrived.
Overall, the Cryonicles had a nice run. They exceeded many people's expections, and made the playoffs for only the 3rd time in franchise history. I did rank them 2nd in my Power Rankings, so I suppose they fell a tad short of my own expectations. That being said, they still had a respectable season; anything can happen in the playoffs, and the team clearly suffered from some misfortune in the semifinals. The team made some intelligent drafting decisions, despite having a few overpays throughout the auction. The one major flaw of the draft, however, was the decision to take Leftiez for 16.5k. That selection was absolutely baffling at the time, and only continued to look worse and worse as the season progressed. If the team didn't waste so much money on him, perhaps they could have upgraded some of their weaker slots. That being said, this was an encouraging season for a franchise that has been rotting in the SPL wasteland for countless seasons. Managers PDC and Triangles showed that they have what it takes to build a competent a roster, and, if some luck breaks their way, I think that they might have what it takes to finally deliver this franchise its first trophy in the near future.