DCringe's Unofficial Unbiased Power Rankings
(Disclaimer: If you are offended by these fun PRs, you should go outside)
Archens (PR Rank: 4)
SS Rank: 3 (#6, #12, #15, #17) / SM Rank: 5 / XY Rank: 3 / BW Rank: 5 / DPP Rank: 8
Tazz returns as manager, hoping to return the dino birds to championship status like LCPL 8. After stealing Boulicrok for 10k, Tazz solidified a strong SS core by drafting King Leo V, the blue baby boy, and resident weeb #2 Chloe. The team's SS has the firepower to take on any SS core, especially if BBB can get back into form. However, the oldgens of this team might be the team's downfall. Tazz's fail upbids led to him getting a 12k inactive DPP slot, which is now being slotted by a monotype main, and a second BW player, who actually got traded for a good return. Overall, the team will live or die by their SS and Corckscrew; a bad showing by their SS could lead to a repeat of their Week 1 showing.
Kohlis (PR Rank: 3)
SS Rank: 1 (#1, #4, #10, #23) / SM Rank: 8 / XY Rank: 8 / BW Rank: 7 / DPP Rank: 1
Top heavy does not begin to describe the build-up of this team. #1 ranked LCer and youtuber Serene Grace constructed a SS juggernaut consisting of LC circuit champion kythr, resident weeb #3 watashi, and toxic crawDaunt VoltSwitch. This is further supported by #1 ranked DPP Nails, who hopes to capitalize on his past DPP LC success and dominate this pool. This team has a really strong tiebreak and should be able to win a couple weeks from their "guaranteed slots". To compensate for his spendings, the rest of the team is filled out by 3k buys. Blimax, Splash, and fran17 are ranked near the bottom of their pools but demonstrated their upsides by getting crucial wins in Week 1. This is a good sign and will surely be needed when their strong slots have bad days, especially since the subs are mostly SS focused.
Oshawotts (PR Rank: 6)
SS Rank: 7 (#13, #22, #24, #32) / SM Rank: 2 / XY Rank: 5 / BW Rank: 3 / DPP Rank: 3
The Oshawotts drafted a whole bunch of people and instituted a channel dedicated to feet. What could possibly go wrong??? The team is headlined by the Jox + Fille core; expect them to be drunk at 3 am and get a bunch of wins for the team. This core is accompanied by Toadow and HSOWA, which are at the top echelon of their pools, and the self-sufficient Mikaav, who was underrated in the PRs. The rest of the team is considered by many to be average at best. First time manager Jox drafted an army of 3-5k picks that could have been used to grab a more expensive player. The team doesn't have a lot of pressure to perform, which may be beneficial to the many first time LCPL players on the roster, and has a bunch of upsides, shown by their Week 1 performance. Also, their team chat is PR ranked 1 by a mile.
Panchams (PR Rank: 2)
SS Rank: 6 (#9, #14, #27, #30) / SM Rank: 4 / XY Rank: 2 / BW Rank: 2 / DPP Rank: 4
The Panchams might be the most balanced team in the draft. Steal retain Wail Wailord is accompanied by Discord main and Budew wielder Shrug, Croagunk user and boomer Heysup, giveaways hater Finchinator, and the reliable iss. These 5 are expected to perform in their respective slots and bring this team much-needed wins. The remaining slots are pretty decent as well, with MZ and Meta being tour players with prior LC experience and imanalt being a three time LCPL champ and piloting DPP. The slots are also Sciroccoo, Raj Shoot, Mcsim, and grizzz ready to sub in SS at any time. Expect a lot of techs from this team and a whole lot of slowpoke and cottonee usage.
Phanpys (PR Rank: 7)
SS Rank: 8 (#20, #21, #26, #31) / SM Rank: 1 / XY Rank: 1 / BW Rank: 4 / DPP Rank: 6
Last year's champs return with the same formula: spend big on old gens and put tour players in SS. The Starmasters are headlined by the core of Star + Levi. These two are expected to top their respective pools while supporting their teammates with enough teams to start another LCPL. This oldgen core is further strengthened by bugzinator and obii, two players that are expected to defy their average PR ranks. Of course, when u spend big on one section, another section is gonna tank. The Phanpys' SS core is ranked last due to having only 1 "mainer". Mainer bias aside, this SS core has the opportunity to do serious damage, shown by their Week 1 demolishing of the Panchams and would have gone 4-0
(IF ONLY SJNEIDER CAN WIN WITH A +2 SUB SCRAGGY - ojr ). Expect the KSG + Star + Levi support to come through. This team always gets ranked low and makes playoffs, so expect the same this time.
Shellos (PR Rank: 8)
SS Rank: 5 (#7, #8, #28, #29) / SM Rank: 6 / XY Rank: 7 / BW Rank: 6 / DPP Rank: 5
Shellos, referred to as Team Central + Italy by tyranteeeno, are viewed as last by the power rankers. The team actually has a very decent SS core; Laroxyl and Burntzebra are very capable players, with Laroxyl also being an excellent builder, while zeriloa is underrated on PRs (as long as opponents do not bring a Tentacool). The 4th SS slot is a bit shaky, but Surfy, CMDoge, Voltix, and Albinson should suffice. However, the old gens of the team is much less desireable, especially now with IFM leaving the DPP slot. The addition of Sparksblade to the lineup should boost the core a bit, but most individuals expect this old gens core to be average at best. Being the 8th ranked team sucks, but the only direction this team can go is up.
Skitties (PR Rank: 1)
SS Rank: 3 (#2, #5, #18, #25) / SM Rank: 3 / XY Rank: 4 / BW Rank: 1 / DPP Rank: 7
nyahhhh! The perennial LCPL playoff contender hopes to make a splash after revamping the core. Gone are the Europeans and in are the WAP members. Led by low timer Lily and "coke" addict Dcae in current gens and Plas and team cancer Trash in old gens, the Skitties hope to ride their PR rank into a championship. The sheer star power of this team might be able to carry the remaining crew consisting of resident weeb Trace, @everyone Alkione, Tier Leader attacker ojr, and Chinchou user Acehunter. The subs are sorta underwhelming, as Simbo may or may not be washed and Elfuseon may or may not bring a fight resist. Overall, a very good team, shown by their 7-1 Week 1, and well deserving of the number 1 PR Rank.
Swablus (PR Rank: 5)
SS Rank: 2 (#3, #11, #16, #19) / SM Rank: 7 / XY Rank: 6 / BW Rank: 8 / DPP Rank: 2
SWABLUS nine (fake manager) gave tko n luthier (real managers) free room to draft w/e player they went for the price they wanted even if it made no sense and that's what they did surprisingly though it worked, (prob because there were even worse drafters in the pool). -
daunt vs Swablus WAP 2.0 is carried by LC Open champion Ninjadog, LC Open semifinalist tko, and Moat. The team's SS core is bolstered by the acquisition of Z strats and TDK. The PR gods have ranked our old gens core of DPP LC main rozes, Little Drilbur, and Bushtush low, but its aite. They good.
Again, these are for-fun PRs, and you shouldn't be offended by them.
taranteeeno